Making a commitment to get sober is the first step towards a new life. Often, as we begin our adventure to living a clean and sober lifestyle, we encounter problems. These problems can be especially troublesome when they are part of our relationships.
Expecting these problems magically to disappear as soon as we put down the drink or the drug is unrealistic. Dealing with the problems inherent to an alcoholic lifestyle requires time and patience. That patience is essential in relationships damaged by alcoholism.
Certainly your life will improve beginning at day one in sobriety. With each new day, you will intuitively begin to appreciate how to deal with a variety of problems. Here are the three most common types of relationships and what you might expect when navigating the problems in these relationships while staying sober.
There are a number of things to consider when starting your journey in sobriety. One is the idea that you may have been part of a codependent relationship. It can be an unwelcome problem for a newly clean and sober alcoholic to face such prospects.
However, they are often the reality. When you are in a committed relationship, married or not, it can be difficult to face the harsh facts. The relationship may very well endure the tests of early sobriety.
However, expecting all the problems inherent in a codependent alcoholic relationship simply to evaporate when you get sober is unrealistic. Relationship therapy is essential, and couples group settings can be excellent tools to help restore civility and normality to these types of relationships.
There are funny analogies that have been passed around recovery communities for years. One is the idea of how soon in sobriety an alcoholic should consider becoming involved in a new relationship. While there are no hard and fast rules written anywhere, there are a few proven suggestions.
Some say to start with a plant. If the plant lives, try a pet of some simple variety, such as a fish. If you can keep these two living things alive and healthy for two years, maybe you’ll be able to navigate the far more difficult waters of a one-on-one human relationship.
For the alcoholic who isn’t part of a codependent setting or single, existing relationship problems can be baffling. As with nearly every life problem, putting down the drink or drug doesn’t magically make these problems vanish.
All problems, especially those within relationships, can take time to resolve. Making a commitment to live a clean and sober life is a monumental step in the right direction. While you can expect improvements almost immediately, the resolution of relationship problems will be a steady process.
One huge hurdle to overcome in early sobriety is when the other half of a committed relationship does drink alcoholically or abuse drugs. A spouse or significant other who can drink in moderation can pose a risk to your own sobriety.
You must be open and honest with those entrusted with helping you in early sobriety. Sometimes the experience of sobriety can present you with appealing suggestions for dealing with relationship problems.
However, fellow alcoholics and drug addicts are not always the most reliable source of relationship advice. In fact, the most competent, sober alcoholic will probably stress the fact that he or she is not a marriage or relationship counselor.
Keep in mind that the vast percentage of alcoholic relationships that fail are because someone did not choose to get sober. Your own recovery must begin and remain paramount to everything else.
Existing relationships with children involved present yet another paradox. Nothing in the equation changes when it comes to what must be a priority. If you want to have any success at resolving even the simplest relationship problems, you must strive to stay the course in your own sobriety first.
There are going to be many problems that will arise during not only early sobriety but throughout the course of your lifelong sober journey. Relationships are just one of the more dangerous traps. The primary objective must be to stay focused on the key ingredient to successful progress; sobriety.
If you think you have a problem with alcohol, seek help today. The promise of recovery is not guaranteed, and neither is your success in dealing with relationship problems. However, the solution to your problems needs to begin with sobriety. Start your journey by getting help today at 888-380-0342.